Saturday, September 26, 2015

ten




It's hard to believe that it's been ten years since my mom left this life.

At this time of year I always pull out 'Motherless Daughters' by Hope Edelman
and read through some pages.

For the first time I read the chapter about when a motherless daughter becomes a mother for the first time.
Having a baby has brought a lot of emotions so it was interesting to read this chapter for the first time.

I am so thankful that Hunter got to spend time with my mom before he came to this earth. 
And I hope she's playing with and teaching our future children.
As much as I long to have her here,
for me and for Hunter,
I am thankful that we will all get to be together again someday.

"Motherless daughters often say they feel whole again when they have a child of their own. They say the type of intimacy they lost when their first mother-child bond broke returns when they reenter the relationship from the other side. And they say becoming a mother allows them to reconnect with their mothers, and in doing so regain a small part of the original mother-daughter relationship.

Pregnancy and the postpartum period can be bittersweet times for the motherless daughter, who feels closer to her mother as she becomes one but also feels an intense sadness as she confronts her loss again. As a milestone event in a woman's life, childbirth - particularly with the first child - commonly triggers a new cycle of morning for the lost mother, involving intense feelings of grief, sadness, anger, or despair. The woman mourns not only the loss of her mother's advice and support but also the loss of a grandmother for her child. As a mother to be, she also looks at her mother through the eyes of perspective mother. When she sees her as a woman with children, a woman very much like the woman she will soon be, she can understand more fully what her mother lost. Instead of morning exclusively as a daughter, she mourns as a mother as well."

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